Girl 1: 3 dates already?! I mean, you don't have much time. Did you talk about marriage?
Girl 2: Not yet, I was going to wait until the fifth date.
Girl 1: No, you've got to talk to him now.
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Sign in the ladies room in the Math Classroom Building
"This lounge is for nursing mothers only."
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(One married woman discussing dating options for an unmarried friend-married woman is wearing a shirt that says "I love Mormon boys" in which her newborn son is goobering all over)
Girl 1:...well, I guess he's nice. He runs alot and has a really tight body...I think that you'd just love him....only problem is that he is from Nairobi.
Girl 2: Is he a member of the church? It can't be too bad.
(Question---they are talking about a future husband for this girl...shouldn't she be more inquistive about this guy, you know...trying to make a decision based on more than "a tight body"? This is marriage for all eternity you know....)
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Sign on the elevator in the business building
"Do your heart a favor, take the stairs! You should only use the elevator if you are infirmed, over 75, or under a doctor's care."
My personal response---- "F@$% that! The only way up this hill is through your building and it's four flights of stairs framed in a glass box....just watch me NOT take the stairs."
Mr.3's response to my response-----"Indeed!"
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My conversation with a secretary in the building...
Me: Excuse me miss, where is the ladies room?
Girl: Ok, well. You need to go back down the hall, do you see the stairs? (Keep in mind that we are standing right next to them and the men's room) Take the stairs down, make a left...no I mean a right, down the hall and I think that it should be somewhere about like the men's room."
Me: You mean, that the bathroom is just the floor below, in the same place of the men's room?"
Girl: Yeah...that's right....that sounds much easier to find!
-----I was nice and didn't ask her how long she had been working there.-----
3 comments:
Loved the "snippets". They are sad and a little bit scary but oh so true of the culture.
Here in Southern California, the 'restroom' conversation would have gone something like this:
you: "excuse me miss . . . where's the ladies room?"
the OC girl: "last time i checked, it is still where it always has been . . . oh, do you need help finding it?"
you saying: "yes, that's right."
you thinking: "what an idiot!"
the OC girl: "i really can't help you. i am usually hanging out by the boys room . . . no wait . . . that's a joke."
you: "i really need to go. come on! tell me!!!"
the OC girl: "ok . . . if you insist . . . go down past the starbucks, then turn left at the louis vuitton store, then take the elevator up to where the entrance to neiman marcus is facing you, then resist the temptation and look toward the opposite direction, and halfway between channel and tiffany, and accross from the georgette klinger spa will be the ladies room."
that was so much funnier than anything that I could have made up! Thanks Metin!
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