Monday, February 06, 2012

The Update on the Mr.3 Situation

If you are a Facebook friend or read my Twitter feed you will, no doubt, have noticed that my ex.husband aka Mr. 3 aka the-man-of-a-thousand-aliases has been arrested.

As there is an open investigation pending I can not give out many details. I can tell you that he is currently incarcerated under multiple fraud charges in Virginia. And that after Virginia is done with him Maryland will take him from there. How he was arrested will also have to be something that I can not disclose at this time for the safety and privacy of the multiple victims involved.

The real meaty part of this post, however, is how I reacted to this news. Its funny how often people ask "well what are you going to do if you ever see him again?" There really isn't an answer because you are going to react however you react in the moment, it is not predictable at all. At first I was elated and then it sunk in.....I felt decidedly unsafe. I had some hysterics. And if I wasn't employed in the place that I am now, and had the tools that I do now to handle trauma, the end results of this would be very different indeed. Luckily, I work with a bunch of trained crisis counselors....and my family and friends were able to give me the space that I needed to process and work through my feelings on this. It is very easy to get sucked into this whole...thing...that has happened. And now I can tell you that I am on the other side of it. So that when I opened my mail last Friday to find a jail letter from Mr.3, I wasn't emotional about it at all. There were 3 letters: one to me, to my lil bro, and to my Mom. The letters are apologetic in a general sense, with claims that he has reconnected to his faith, and asking for forgiveness. Even with all the references he made to my blog in these letters, he failed to remember that I had offered him forgiveness ages ago. My Dad's response to these letters was very short and carefully chosen in the way that only my Dad can be: "two words: bull shit".

So where does this leave things? Pretty much the same as they were before except that now I for sure know where he is. Last time he was in jail, not all of his activities were known, and now we are more organized. And also.....I should really get back to writing this book. It looks like there really might be an ending now.

34 comments:

~Niki said...

there are now 12 charges against him now in case you are keeping track. It went from 6 to 12 today as he was arraigned on the others.

Anonymous said...

There are actually 17 counts!

~Niki said...

yeah I looked earlier in the afternoon, then blamo! I was told there will be more a-comin' too. Oh and don't forget - 2 counts in Juvenile court you can't see...

Anonymous said...

Your dad is right.

I am so glad they have him...hopefully he will stay a while. I do believe he is wanted in other states also, so maybe they can all get their hands on him.

Anonymous said...

Yes I came across this man as well. He is so clearly a sociopath--clearly. My hope is that he will be incarcerated for a very long time where he can no longer hurt people. I firmly believe that he is one of the most intelligent men I've ever met--something that makes him even more dangerous. I do not believe for one second that his remorse is genuine--rather a way to mitigate his sentence.

Anonymous said...

Just a follow on...I've read all your posts about him and I find it fascinating that the very thing that makes women great mothers (e.g. the ability to recognize and nuture potential in someone) is something that we must guard against when getting into a relationship) What I'm saying is simply this--it matters not whether he is how he is because of PTSD or perhaps he was potty trained at gunpoint--who knows and who cares. The point is that he's a liar and the instant that we (women) catch our potential sig other in a lie, it's time for him to go...just my $.02 worth. In adult males potential is meaningless and what is the reality is meaningful.

Anonymous said...

Another thing I'm having a hard time wrapping my head around is that if Niki was also married to him and claimed not to have any prior knowledge of what he was up to, how does she explain comments on this blog dating back to 2009--I don't get that. Does that make you wonder?

Delal said...

I think that if I have learned anything from this whole experience is that I should never try to figure out other people's reasoning for their actions.

Anonymous said...

I hear where you are coming from, but the puzzle pieces don't fit in my head. She seems to maintain that his actions were a complete mystery to her and yet she clearly knew about them dating back to 2009. I guess I'll just have to wait for your book...

Anonymous said...

For reasons I cannot understand this is a nightmare I cannot seem to shake in my life...just when I think all thoughts of this creep are over something happens and I am reminded of him again...I suppose you can never really escape your past...but I sure have tried to put it behind me. Anyway, I was just curious if you could share any details on his arrest...also if you know why he was in that area of the U.S. Thanks. I appreciate your willingness to be so open about your life and this situation. I'm a bit tired of living my life wondering if he will pop out of the past and bring some sort of pain into the present or future...it would be nice to know he can finally be forgotten, but for some reason I just can't shake the unease...and it's been way too many years to continue living with that unease...

Delal said...

Yeah, I still have the oddest things trigger me as well. And of course, he used my little brother's ID information again, and we are currently trying to deal with a second round of the identity theft issues. Even though I get triggered still, as time goes on the episodes last less. I also have a good support system, and you will always have one here.

Some details on the arrest...As I understand it, his initial arrest came out of a domestic dispute between him and his current wife. It sounds to me like his latest version of illegal activity unraveled and there was an altercation that happened when he was trying to flee. The situation with the current wife is complicated to say the least because she is someone I know and had considered as a friend....and I've been coming to terms with knowing that all the time I was giving her information about him (because she has represented herself as a victim of his as well) that she was feeding all of that to him. She also was gathering information from me and others...and hiding the fact that she was still with him and had married him. To make the matter stranger (and we don't need to go into the why of this) she is a lawyer and last I heard is defending him. Of course, the information that she is defending him in court has come to me secondhand. They were living in Virginia most likely for job purposes and the ability to hide in plain sight.

As to the court case...his 18 counts of various frauds has been wittled away to 4 counts. But four very "timely" ones. 1 count is the fugitive from justice charge for his dealings in Maryland in 2007-08...that court date is July 25th if I remember rightly. The other three counts are for obtaining money under false pretenses for both under $200 and over $200. According to Virginia law code (I've been researching) those three counts if convicted are labeled as larceny. Two of those counts carry a sentence of 1-5 years in prison, the other count carries a sentencing minimum of 20 years in prison. These counts will then be taken to a grand jury in July (whatever the third Monday of the month is). The grand jury will determine if he will be inditing on these charges....and let's be honest, and indictment is very very likely. From there it will be plea deals or trial. In either case, if there is an indictment, I can't see how he would escape jailtime....and I am very glad that Virginia law has such harsh sentencing guidelines for larceny. :)

Anonymous said...

Update--you most likely know this, but I searched on Niki's name in the circuit court of the specified county and it would appear that she has been indicted on three felony counts--unrelated to his charges. I met this guy and had NO IDEA that he was married to her. She called me and attempted to solicit information from me. Something did not seem right about her so I just didn't respond to her. They deserve each other... From looking at the circuit court case data it looks to me like he's going to plead out? Not sure, but the Grand Jury did return a "true bill".

Delal said...

Dear Anon,
Thank you for the information on Niki. The child abuse felonies are quite a shock that she has been indicted on. I searched the general court records and she has several charges pending that are related to check fraud and general larceny. The Circuit Court information says that she has a warrant for her arrest, which looks like stems from a couple failure to appear charges listed in the regional court system. This is indeed an unexpected turn of events. It saddens me greatly. Maybe there is still a part of me that hasn't reconciled that she really was lying to me that whole time, or that part of me sees her a victim. But she has known all along his criminal activities.... Maybe what saddens me most is that the two of them are incredibly smart and so capable of doing some amazing things with their lives, and they have thrown all of that potential away.

As for an update with Mr.3 himself. He was indicted on those charges earlier this week and has a plea hearing scheduled for next month. Last I heard Niki was representing him, so with her facing jail time (and who knows if she will be able to visit him in jail now if she has this active warrant)....I am not exactly sure what type of outcome will be arranged. Plea-ing him out will be the first choice as trials are costly....but then again. Even with the best lawyer in the world (and one who obviously isn't facing charges herself) I can't see him admitting that he is guilty of anything.

For now, I think that alot of us can breath easier just knowing that he is in jail at the moment.

Anonymous said...

I was sharing this whole situation with a colleague and I must tell you that it I'd my earnest hope that you write your book and are wildly successful. When you get ready and if you are interested I would be happy to be interviewed if that would help you.

I consider myself highly intelligent and the fact that I was "sucked in" by him ( not nearly with the horrible trials you and your brother suffered)astonishes me. If I can help you by sharing my story when the time comes, please posts such on this entry.

Delal said...

Sure, any other personal stories would be great! Besides my story is just one in the saga that is Mr.3. I would love to get a heads up as to who you are, feel free to email me at deborah.ann.dilley@gmail.com

Anonymous said...

the child abuse charges are actually related to his involvement and damage. The same officer conducted both investigations, and as of now, there is a criminal defense in the works, the children are spending time with both their mother and father, and as to those of you who are judging any part of how the children were affected, perhaps they should be left off here as frankly, they are none of anyone's business save their parents.

As to Niki - the truth. Her marriage is currently due to be annulled to Scott. There were lies upon deceit in that situation as well and as only each of you knows your story, so too does she know her own. However she is NOT defending him - that part can be read also on the web where his defense counsel clearly shows 'DIXON' as the name- anything else is is a lie currently being perpetuated by his sister in law after Niki met his brother and answered some questions and wanted to make sure Michael had sufficient information to intervene for Scott should he desire. Nothing more. Again, the marriage is being annulled and has been used as an attempt to show abuse related to 4 children and has caused its share of hardship on yet another family, as it involved not only deceit but adultery, and actions truly only committed by someone without a soul.

Oh and whomever wants to keep broadcasting Niki's charges, please remember that in this country we are innocent until proven guilty and nothing has been proven. When you post up here the things you do without specificity, you do the law an injustice. Once aquitted, she will also have a libel charge against those of you who say things like 'they deserve each other'. Since you are reading up on the law....and her career would of course be adversely affected by this type of gossip if she is not found guilty of all counts.

And as for you Debbie, your information was held in deep trust and only was released to an FBI inspector. It wasn't used to help a fugitive no matter how much he wanted that.You may never be able to believe that, but it is the truth. I feel sadness in yours - and in knowing this will never stop. Once he's out, because his time will be short in the federal realm, he'll do it again. Only this time, who will be the victim? Because he watches us all...all of the time as I've come to find out.

And with that, I've said what I was asked to come here and present.

Delal said...

Well, hello Niki.

All I know about the case against him, and the cases against you are what is publicly available through the Virginia court system. As I have only stated that the charges exist, and also with the fact that I have not used your full name in conjunction with them, I have done nothing in which you can take legal action for. Additionally I have not stated your guilt or innocence as to those charges. And I openly admitted that I could not confirm as to whether or not you are legally representing him. Threatening me to a lawsuit is a tactic of intimidation...and to me a definite sign that you have learned a thing or two from your current husband.

What I know for sure in this situation (and something that I have documented evidence to prove to this effect) is that you have lied to me for years. Your actions towards me and others involved with this has caused harm. And I have really held back my true feelings about you on this blog. I could have written about all that you have done here. And I could have also called in and complained to the bar about your involvement with Mike. I haven't. But I will always reserve the right to.

The only thing that you have said that I believe is truthful in your comment is that he will not stop doing this. The idea of restorative justice only works for people who show true regret in what they have done. He has been with plenty of women who were willing to help him make an honest life and if he hasn't done it by now, he never will.

In the meantime, I would suggest you go to court and start clearing up your charges.

Kathy said...

Wow, Niki, what a load of horseshit. When I left you house, after he beat you terribly why:
--were you still calling him by a different name (Rob) than what you knew it truly was?
--were books and identity theft equipment that he left in my house, then given to you to give to the FBI, still in your house and he was using them?
--did you keep insisting that your own kids kept confusing "Rob" with Randall? They helped perpetuate the lie FOR YOU!!!
--did you have bank statements from Montana for his assumed name?
--did you allow this man to beat up your own son, only to try later to get him off?

You are sick.

And yes, my name is Kathy.

Kathy said...

Oh, one more thing Niki - who are your babby daddys? I thing your four kids have two fathers. Do they know what you did to them - dragging them from state to state with someone you knew was both violent and a fugitive? Would the fathers like to hear about that?

Kathy (not embarrassed to leave my name!)

Anonymous said...

Again, I'm sure the victims in this case already know this, but I did a search in Maryland it it seems that there is an outstanding warrant for him on 18 or so charges all stemming from allegations of identity theft...I'm curious about the statute of limitations, I'm hoping he gets to visit every penal systen the east coast has to offer...

Anonymous said...

I cannot find him in the Virginia system. Is he out?

Delal said...

He is still in. Most of his information can now be found in the Rockingham County Circuit Court information. He has a plea hearing scheduled for the 17th of this month. He also has a hearing today for his felony fugitive warrant charge. He is still a resident of the Rockingham County jail. If you want to receive an update if they move him facilities or let him out (which won't happen for a while I think), do a Google search for Virginia VINE and sign up for their notification service.

Anonymous said...

UGH Continued again... I'm not surprised. I'm guessing that's a legal strategy to hold off on that until the Circuit court case against him is adjudicated. I continue to replay conversations I had with this parasite in my head and there were two instances where I KNEW he was not being honest--yet I let it slip. I say this because he is by far the most cunning, charming, and dangerous individual I have ever met. I am fascinated with him as I would be a very deadly animal. He leaves nothing but destructio in his wake and I believe that he is such a sociopath that there's no such thing as a "cure" or rehabilitation. It's terminal for him...he will always be dangerous and always looking for the next victim. I do have to say he seems to have EXCELLENT taste in women...we seem to be smart, caring and interesting not to mention strong women.

Anonymous said...

Well there is one exception and that would be his alledged accomplice, Niki...

Anonymous said...

Well the latest from both the General District Court and the Circuit Court of Rockingham county Guilty on three counts of Child Abuse and Guilty on the Identity Theft (get docs to make false identity) charge. 3 years suspended sentance...so no jail time unfortunately, but hopefully she will be disbarred. I think I'll work on that myself, it's sort of a hobby for me at this point.

Anonymous said...

Ok, now I'm REALLY confused. I'm checking the circuit court of Virginia and they have decided not to procede? What the heck--I can only HOPE this is because the feds are after him--any info would be greatly appreciated.

Anonymous said...

I notice that his fugitive case has been dismissed, but when I go to the BoP website, he exists but has no release date and is not in their custody...I'm just wondering if anyone knows whether he's still incarcerated or not...please tell me the guy is still locked up.

Delal said...

He is still incarcerated. He has been transferred to the Central Virginia Regional Jail (CVRJ) and is still listed as a federal prisoner. Unfortunately, the VINE system hasn't updated yet. I've been meaning to call my local FBI office to see if they can assist with more information, but that is all I have at the moment.

Anonymous said...

Thank you very much for the info...I like to know where he is if you take my meaning...

Anonymous said...

Just checking in to see if there are any updates on his status. Sleep better at night knowing he is off the streets...

Delal said...

No worries. I have managed to get a bit of an update. He apparently has pleaded guilty to a bunch of fraud charges--although the county clerk's office could have been a little more helpful as to specifics- and has a sentencing hearing scheduled for January 23, 2013. I am going to suck it up and pay for access to the federal public records so I can get the details on the charging documents and plea agreements, etc. Once I do that I will have some more information to let you all know.

As a strange aside...it was Thanksgiving week of 2004 that the two of us met and had our first date. Eight years feels like forever and yesterday.

Anonymous said...

wow do my eyes deceive me? According to reading the disposition of that parasite, Niki's Rockingham County Circuit court records she spent a whopping 5 days in jail...well at least there is that five days for the American University educated Virginia Bar (or should I say on the way to being dis-barred) attorney. I've prided myself on being someone who doesn't hold a grudge but my issue with her is the pattern of deception in support of a sociopath like RSC. I'm hopping from foot with anticipation of his sentencing although I don't hold out much hope because he's not a violent offender--that I know of. Any more information?

Anonymous said...

Just got off the phone with the Virginia Bar. It turns out they have no one by the name that appears in her court records listed as being admitted to the bar. Does anyone know if she has another name?

Delal said...

Not that I know of.

As to Mr.3, I keep forgetting to write a more concise update. I have obtained copies of the publicly available court records. His sentencing is still scheduled for the 23rd. He has plead down to two charges of fraud. The plea agreement did not have a specified amount of years listed in it (although I should probably re-read to be sure) for his sentencing. The maximum amount of time allowable was listed as 10 years for each count. The two charges that he has plead guilty to are also ONLY limited to his activities in Virginia. I am going to contact the prosecuting attorney and ask if victim impact statements can be admitted in the per-sentencing agreement that goes to the judge. If you would like the contact information for that, please email me directly.