Monday, March 31, 2008

Psychotherapy anyone?

Stuff happened last week. Lots of stuff. And most of it annoyed me.

I could just end the post there and everything that would need to be said would have been.

Last week Ibrahim decided to resign from the Middle East Center. Abruptly. I didn't write about it last week because it was generally agreed upon in the office that it would be best to keep it all quiet, but as Ibrahim is telling students and encouraging them to write letters to the University president.....I think that blogging it has now become fair game.

When I came into work last Monday, Linda pulled me aside and told me what happened. Apparently Ibrahim wanted to tell me himself, but you know.....he never got around to it....in fact I had found out that everyone else (with the exception of Kellie who was on vacation in Europe) was personally told about the resignations (note the plural because the Associate Director resigned as well) but me. I admit, I fumed over that. Ibrahim never did try to talk to me, and it seems that he has been actively avoiding me this whole week. Which is probably for the best.....I would tell him exactly what I think of his little gamble and I think that he is avoiding my 'honesty' at the moment.

Anyway, why the abrupt resignation? What else.....a problem with the Dean. And ultimately, that is all that matters. The Dean and the MEC Faculty are again not seeing eye to eye on something. The Dean takes an unusual (and perhaps illegal action by violating the Faculty code) and Ibrahim resigns. No negotiations. No meeting to explain his actions to the staff. No sense or logic....just a resignation.

Of course, as with everything that comes out of the Middle East, one event causes a doomsday worth of speculation. We all thought we were going to lose our jobs, the Center was going to be closed down....we were worried about possible replacements.....it was endless. Nicely, the Dean had a meeting with the staff on Friday and calmed most of our fears. And I was hoping that over the weekend everyone and everything would have calmed down.

Nope. Not by a long shot.

Ibrahim made a gamble in this resignation. He was hoping (or at least I assume that) the President of the University was going to step in and fix it.....or perhaps that the Dean would have begged him to stay. Nope. No word from the President's office, and the Dean immediately accepted his resignation. The rest of the faculty however are all smiles in this show of solidarity of Ibrahim's resignation....they are all happy about impeding lawsuits....and I just want to smack every single one of them over the head. Because this isn't a great victory....it is a crushing defeat, they just haven't realized it yet.

Ibrahim was in DC most of last week, now that he is back we keep hearing (or rather I hear from others) that he is bandying about terms like "occupation", and references to other staff members who have clearly allied themselves with the Dean as "collaborators". In such cases, Linda and I agreed that we should be called "settlers"= there from the beginning and caught in the cross-fire. I am not exactly sure if it is right calling it an 'occupation' if you voluntarily gave up all your rights. And if we have to continue with the Arab/Israeli references..... Ibrahim has yet to realize that he just lost the Sinai. Whoops. So now that 1967 is over.....I am curious to see what the 1973 war example will turn out to be.

In any case, it seems that the most diplomatic person I have ever met has suddenly become the most politically ignorant. They are all crazy and playing a very silly game.....maybe they should be in psychotherapy, which I am happy to say that I started last week. I am quite thrilled. Job 1 has always been the stable thing in my life.....so if it can't be stable at the moment at least I am starting to make headway in the section of my life which has been the most chaotic.

It's strangeness grows by leaps and bounds everyday.

Such as, Mr.3's diploma came in the mail last week. Which means that he paid that overdue tuition bill from Spring 2006 OR that there was a glitch in the system and they sent it to him by accident. If he did pay the bill, that gives more evidence of his intentions (for however short a period that it might have been) of returning. I've been thinking alot about him lately. I found out that a friend of mine just bought a house and is now pregnant....and it makes me seethe with jealousy and anger. Jealousy at her. Anger at him.....because that was the future he had promised me. We were going to have the house and the kid...and now I have to face doing that all on my own now. And it brings back the anger of learning that last summer he was actively trying to have a baby with Kathy....my baby... (Why is everyone having the baby that I was meant to have?) Driving home from work today it dawned on me, What would have happened if he had gotten her pregnant? Would he still have left her? Or would he have stayed and continued life with her for a long as possible? Would her having his child have given him reason to make her take care of him as well? Or....would he just be a jerk-off and still leave her....or was leaving her with a dog enough of a keepsake of their time together to leave behind?

In any case, more for me to work out in psychotherapy.

1 comment:

Kerrith Black said...

Sometimes, even a crushing defeat in defense of what is right is the correct action to take. Ibrahim and Peter are two of the smartest and most respectable people I have known. If they think that resigning in defense of their colleagues was the right thing to do then I will support them in that decision and perhaps even admire them for their stand.