I had planned on writing something frivilous about whatever is living in our sink (no matter how many chemicals we run down it, it still smells foul) or something about the fourth of July holiday, or about how my doctor's visit went really well yesterday....but sometimes you read something that you just must talk-about.
Through other bloggers I found out about a blog called Lightning Strikes Twice, it tells the story of a man who was dianogised with Cancer 12 years ago, only to have his wife dianogised as well. I recommend that you read it from the beginning...and be warned, it is sad. He chronicles life taking care of her and watching her slowly die...and now, how he is handling mourning. In fact, he has an alternate blog-site composed of love letters to his late wife.
Besides directing you to a truly moving story....it of course makes me think of my Uncle's recent death....which oddly enough I had to look up again in my blog because I couldn't remember what month it was. It seems like forever ago and then just yesterday. Most days I don't think about it or him (to be honest). I like to think that I am done mourning him, I said my goodbyes and I shut the door, literally. Reading Lightning Strikes Twice just reminds me that in my Uncle choosing to die in the way that he did--and face it, he did make all the decisions in this matter---that I was spared from a long-ordeal of caring for a terminally ill family member. On the other hand, it reminds me of the anger and resentment that I am other members of my family felt in not being allowed by my Uncle to care for him, because we would have and we wanted too. Maybe it is just the lost hope and having to deal with the absolute stubbornness that my Uncle has always shown is what the real cause of my distress really was. Either way, please read Lightning Strikes Twice....I almost feel envious of his ability to mourn, because most days I feel like I am an orge because my mourning period was so short.