Let's talk a little about my brother...

and why I want to beat his face in.

First off, I love my brother....even through all the theraphy that we have had to go through with him, throughout all of his 'dramatics' and 'hysterics', for the good and the bad, I love the little shit. But there are moments when I hate him fiercely. Today would be one of those days.

First off, my Mom sends me an email telling me (in the beginning section) that she is know the proud owner of 4 hermit crabs. This last weekend when my family was visiting, Jimmy convinced my mom to buy him a couple of Strawberry Hermit Crabs, these are more expensive, and an addition that he has been looking forward to making within his little hermit crab family. There was a catch to these however, he had to raise up his grades and clean his room by last Friday. One of the classes that he needed to work on wasn't going to be updated until yesterday, he got a D, he lost the crabs and visitation rights to them. So now my Mom gets to keep them for herself. At the end of the email, my mom wrote a frantic all capitalized note saying that she had just gotten a call from the school, something was wrong with Jimmy and that she needed to get down there as soon as possible.
Well Jimmy and his friends have been playing with home-made Weegie Boards at school. Apparently during science class he began to talk to himself and then freaked out because "whoever he was 'talking' with" had told him that the Devil was going to get him. First problem, obviously messing with the board. Now, I messed around with this stuff in 8th grade and scared myself shitless (we had supposedly opened some portal to hell...real long story)..and even though he and his friends insist that they are talking only to "friendly spirits", I'm sorry but that is just an open door and who knows who is going to walk through it. Second, regardless of the fact whether or not you believe in it, he shouldn't be doing it, not at home, not at school, not at all. And thirdly, I suspect that this is another way of him pushing my mom's buttons. When I talked to my Mom after her meeting with the school counsolers she was a mess, crying and freaking out about my brother. The amount of emotional bull that he has been pulling on her and the rest of my family for years is sickening. We have had therapists tell us in the past that he pulls shit on purpose: to control, to dominate, to have his own way because he is incapable of really being able to have empathy or sympathy for others. It is a sick game that he plays and he dragged my mother down with him today.
The school officials said that he needs to "get help", my parents are still trying to find a way to pay for the last time that he needed to "get help". So he has a shrink appointment for next week, but until then, who knows what he is going to come up with.
I called and yelled at him this evening. I told him that he shouldn't be messing with it, it's dangerous. His behavior needs to be checked and if I heard of him continuing to mess around with this stuff I would haul his ass down to the local priest so that they could have a "chat". (Now for those who know me, that last statement might sound odd, I am Muslim, my mom is Catholic and my dad is Lutheran...I was raised to find my own path but I still carry a great amount of respect for aspects of Catholism--and no one messes better with the devil than the Catholics) I also told him that if he doesn't shape up I would gladly help my father pay to send him off to military school.

The strange thing was that he didn't fight with me, barely grunted answers to my questions. Now I know that he is mad at me, but nothing will happen with him, because it never does...I vent and vent and vent...but he never listens, he never cares...and it hurts to love someone as much as I do and to still have the knowledge that nothing really matters to that person besides their wants. I suspect that by the time this week is out, one of two things will happen: One, he will forget that I was ever angry at him, and this weekend when we visit for Easter will be like any other weekend, or Two, he is going to pull some other stunt that is worse than this one, and Mr.3 will get a real dose of my family in full fighting form.

The other thing that bothers me about all of this is the fact that I had that dream about the family fighting last Thursday night. It was like I predicted it...and that worries me, because again nothing was resolved and I had to go back on my pills for my stomach again. I had to take 2 today, and I was an inch within dropping everything to drive the 2 hours down to my parents to console my mom.
God, he is such a prick!

mondee..

so I have 20 minutes or so before I have to go to my class, and unfortuately this is the only thing that I have to occupy my time, not that blogging is a bad thing, but rather the lack of anything interesting to say.
Mandy, the old AA, pre-JB, came in today with her little baby. Connor is so much fun to play with and I keep telling her that she should call me to babysit. If I play with other people's babies, I get it out of my system. I am not in a position to have a child at this point in time, oh, but one day I will....hummm...babies....yeah I really need to play with some other people's kids.. Last night Mr.3 was watching some show about bible code and within it the world is supposed to end in the year 2012 (which incidently is also the same year that the Aztec calendar ends). If this is truely the case I would like to have a kid before then, but 7 years is a ways off, how knows how my life would change... a little over 3 month ago I wouldn't have predicted that I would be where and with who I am with now so the sky's the limit for the future.

but back to the bible code thing...something definitely doesn't feel right about it. And granted it appears to be a good predictor, but it predicts using a combination of words that could loosely fit together in a crossword style faction. There is the distinct possiblity that people are trying too hard to find something out of nothing. Plus, if this in turn turns out to be true then it says very little for the improbablity of determining your own fate. And I'm sorry but that is way too much control for me to give up. I'll agree to having a series of choices presented to you, and whatever choice you make determines your fate, but I don't want to feel like something is controlling me. Although, I should get a book on it for my Dad, he loves this conspiracy theory stuff.

Speaking of books, I finished the book called "the 13th element", it is about the history of the element phosphorous..and it was incredibly good....although I think that it scared me a bit more than what I would like about nerve agents, the chapter about the possibility of spontanous human combustion was quite humorous. Now I am reading a book called "Eats, Shoots & Leaves" which is all about punctuation. Highly humorous. But this last week of reading items completely unconnected with my current field of study was a wonderful idea, last night I worked on Turkish, and it came along fairly easily.

Just Checking In

Taking Wednesday off from work was wonderful! It felt like we were playing hookie all day long.
Pretty mundane stuff that we did, Mr.3 got a suit, I bought a purse that I have been lusting after in all of my materialistic glory, and we bought some books...like I didn't already have enough to read anyway for school. And we also got the wireless router set up in the new house, so now I can actually check my email at home again.

Yesterday was just awful though, the bug knows how to ruin any good mood. And it wasn't much, it was just that I had to deal with her on a few things and she didn't understand that I don't want a detailed explanation of an entire process that she has to go through, I just want a yes or no answer. I think that the stress that she caused me got me all knotted up. My intestines had started to cramp after work and then I had a nightmare of sorts and my stomach was all kinds of messed up and I had to go and find my medication...I haven't had to take that since JB left the office.
The dream I had was odd, because it was of my entire family having one horrific row with each other, it was similar to other huge fights that we have had when my little brother was in theraphy....apparently the dream was so distressing that I was grinding my teeth and the clicking of my jaw woke up Mr.3, who woke me up. My jaw still hurts. See when Jimmy was "at camp" as he put it, I had to be strong for my Mom and the rest of the family, so I didn't cry or anything, but to handle the stress I would clench my jaw...resulting in several months of dentist bills this last fall. I have got to find better ways of handling stress...I really don't have that much of it, I have it fairly easy.. I just don't want to sit and cry all the time when things get rough.

Shopping Cart Sumo Wrestling

Last night I had a dream that I kept challenging people to “rumble” with me. We would have to find isolated parts of a store and then we would take two shopping carts and use them as sumo wrestlers…it was fun, but you had to watch your hands.

In other news….yesterday I felt all out of sorts, well I have for the last week, and I think that I was just in an intellectual rut so to speak. The idea lately of working on anything remotely Turkish in my studies has repulsed me, and consequently I am a month behind in my homework. My teacher is cool, but I have to get out of this. So what I think it was was just overload on one subject. So we went to the U Bookstore to buy me a book. I was planning on getting only one book, but ended up getting 4. I finished one of them yesterday, it was about the possibility in physics and astronomy on the subject of time travel under the guise of relativity theory. I liked it a lot and I really needed to read about something that was completely unconnected to what I have been doing. Now I am reading a book on the history or phosphorous. So anyway, yesterday the bug comes into my office, sees the shopping bag, and says “oh, you went to the Bookstore? What did you get?” and then she proceeded to go through the bag! Am I crazy or is that brushing the side of being abnormally rude? And then to top it off, she criticized my choice in books! Her son is an astronomer and recently published a book called “Astronomy made easy”, that’s nice but considering that my first college course that I took when I was 15 years old was Astronomy, I don’t think that I need to have an introductory book, let alone pay for a high priced book that I am never going to read because it is below my level!

Today, dear Kate is taking the day off, I am taking tomorrow off (due to the fact that the water will off in the building and I am just too lazy to walk to another building to pee—although the bug would have a harder time trying to find me). And as predicted the bug has already called in late this morning. I think that at this point I have enough information to make an accurate scale of tardiness/absenteeism for the bug.

-Call for or from husband the night before: 2-3 hours late due to hangover
-Snow over 1 inch, 3-4 hours late to “dig herself out”, which includes 30 minutes of shoveling and an hour to have a hot toddy to “warm up”
-Kate being out of the office, migraine and slept in, might be in in a few hours or not at all, depends upon the severity of the hangover.

This is only a short list that I am sure that it will be expanded, however, if in the event that one of the following factors occurs on a day that she has a class, she somehow manages to come in on time for that. Strange isn’t it?

Cookies and “daffy” old ladies

It’s spring break on campus, so the office will be extraordinarily slow, but it will give me more time to blog, so that must be good for regular readers.

So the fam came for a visit this week, and the little bro was in true form. Now I had bought some girl scout cookies as a treat. I can’t consider them as something to munch on because they are so expensive $3.50 a box. And I put them up and out of the way so as not to tempt myself and other people. Saturday night I opened a roll of thin mints, which between the 5 of us, ate only half the roll. I find out last night after they were gone that my brother had eaten oh so much more. In fact he finished the thin mints, ate a hunk of the samoas, and half a package of Chips Ahoy cookies. He was careful however, not to open any new packages of cookies. I think that I would have been better if he had, because this smacks of sneakiness, and it makes me wonder what else he has done.

And continuing on with cookies. The bug brought in some girl scout cookies this morning and she was in a good mood. So one, she is happy because she is showing off her financial wealth (non-existant as it may be) with the girl scout cookies for the office, two, this is another opportunity for her to set the example of “sharing” in the office (I’m sorry but just because I eat my lunch at my desk sometimes does not mean that it is communal food), and three…she has probably already been drinking. I won’t touch the cookies because they are from her, yes it sounds petty, but if I can’t stand to be in the same room with the women, why would I eat her food?

When she was in here earlier she was talking about her flowers, and how her tulips havn’t come up yet or her “daffies”. Yes, she said “daffies”. What the hell is that? They are called fricking daffodils, they are flowers, not objects of baby babble!

a short note

just to let you all know how cool my boss is.

last week I had to deal with a student of his who basically chewed me out because "I" did not respond to his messages or his emails. When "I" found out that he had yelled at me, he made the student call back (from Kuwait no less) and apologize to me before he would do anything for him.

today, we were putting out flyers for the lecture series and the director of the Union building was a complete ass and got mad at me for putting them out on the tables. I explained to him that we had been doing this for over a year and now they are having a fit? So either way, since I am not feeling well I was on the verge of crying (I later did anyway) so I just left. Came back to the office and told Kate, who promptly told "I" and left a message on the director of the Union's machine. Later as "I" was driving to the airport to pick up the speaker, he called and notified me that the director will also apologize to me. That is cool, unnessacary but cool.

So while it appears that I have fallen off of the face of the earth

I haven't. Just been busy, busy, busy.

Model Arab League Regional competition was on Feb. 17-19. We won. A lot. Mr.3 was outstanding delegation in his committee, Anisa won outstanding, Jason won honorable mention, Jack won honorable mention, as well as Brianne and Steve. Overall for the team we won Outstanding Delegation. I, as Secretary General will remain so for next year's Regional Competition and for Nationals I got promoted to Chief of Staff. And I have just finished (boy is my head fryed too) writing a full year syllabus for the Model Arab League course so that I can pitch it to our advisor. We put in enough work for it to be a 3 credit class, why shouldn't we be able to get more than the one credit hour that is avaiable.

In other news, my "cousin" translated here as my Mom's Best Friend's son is in a band call The Bradbury Press and the are playing tonight in SLC. So while they are here in town they are staying with Mr.3 and I. I haven't seen Darren for something like 14 years, so it is very strange. I thought that he would be taller...hummm...anyway...they came over last night and I was going to go out with them to a Karaoke bar but I declined because I had to leave for work and class at 7am this morning...and well...any oppurtunity for nookie with Mr.3 is always worth being unsociable. But we are definitely going to see them play tonight..I only need to find some time to study for my Lingustics mid-term tomorrow. I should have been able to work on studying at work today, but I was just too busy for that. We will see how well I can cram into this evening and tomorrow at work, wish me luck.

Other than that I am just waiting for the clock to hit five----19 minutes left to go! so that I can leave and meet Darren, the band, Doug, Kelly and my Mom at the Training Table for dinner. Which sounds like fun, but feels like a hassle. Oh well.
till next time...
d

oh, and one more thing...I am unveiling by hot pink fishnet tights today...their fun!

The Bug, annoying people at lightning speed

So for the past 2 days Linda, Kate and "I" have been at a workshop in DC. So this basically leaves me and the bug to open and run the office. Not too big of a deal. Because really it means, it is all me to run the office, especially in the morning.

So Monday morning, I was thinking to myself...this would be just the day to for the bug to skip out on work...it is the prefect oppurtunity...she didn't but she made sure to tell me that she didn't feel very well and probably shouldn't be at work. When I asked her why she was here and not at the doctor, she told me that her doctor couldn't do anything unless she had a fever...my question is what kind of voodoo doctor does she go to?

This morning, it is snowing...and I rightly predicted that she would be snowed in. And as sure as I live and breathe there was a message from her this morning saying that she wouldn't be in until late as she is snowed in. But she made sure to mention that she had plently of comp time built up. Yes, that is true. She has been bilking the system for months...she can't figure out how to do her job during regular working hours, so she stays in her office late to "finish things up", which really means that she is messing around with student files that she doesn't understand all because her home life is so unsatisfactory that she has to inflict it all of the rest of us. And while I was writing this she called to make sure that I got her message and to tell me that she is running a negative fever....why doesn't she just say that she isn't going to come in at all and stop this wasting time?

This wouldn't normally bother me as much, if I didn't need to leave and get an X-ray and pick up Mr.3's paycheck. On Friday afternoon, I really couldn't deal with anything and went home early...the DISH network people were screwing things up for the 3rd and final time--we're done with them...and my little brother was at the house. So in the afternoon we went to a local bookstore, and I in my klutziness fell down a flight of wooden stairs...besides the clerks completely ignoring me and the fall (and this was a small locally owned bookstore, they saw but refused to acknowledge me) I had to go to the doctor last night because I hurt so bad. According to the doctor I have 2 sprained ankles and one sprained knee...and we need to do an x-ray to make sure that i haven't caused any further damage. So as I am hobbleing around all day yesterday---listening to the bug talk about how she was going to be more "caring" for lent---she managed to not even notice...and of course the day when I need her (which is a laugh in itself) she isn't here. So maybe later today I might get the chance to go get the X-ray but probably not.

Other things that she did yesterday to tick me off:

1. Asked me if I knew where a file was on HER OWN computer.
2. Asked me to give her a "matrix" of a list of 10 professors schedules. As far as I know I am not the personal secretary to the whole department. Maybe I missed something. The only information that I have is the class schedule that she AS THE ACADEMIC ADVISOR has. But apparently she can't look at that and think for herself. Never mind the fact that she is a month late already in setting up this meeting. Glad to know that she is on top of things.

Reasons to hate the phone company

When we first took possession of the condo in Jan. I knew that we were going to be without phone service for a little while, and I was ok with that. I called on the 17th of last month and I was notified that it might take up to three weeks but would be working no later than Monday Feb. 7th. When I initially switched to MCI they told me that it would be 3 weeks and it only took a week, and I was expecting the same basic situation. But when I had to offically give up the old apartment I called to see what was going on. I was told that they were processing the order and that it should be ready before the 7th. I called last Friday,to see what was happening, and I was then notified that there was a "problem" with setting it up and that it would take another 2 weeks! The person I spoke to was supposed to call me on Monday and didn't. So I called again yesterday, demanded phone service or I was gonna leave...a project manager called me back...the absolute earliest that they could get the phone to work was this Friday....a full month of waiting! I'm sorry but that is not acceptable. So I cancelled my service completely and I have now gone to...and I hate it because I have such a hatred for them...a cell phone. But at least I had service immediately and I was able to call my mom. I swear it will be forever until I get internet access to my home, but I guess that I can use work for all of that stuff...I have for the past month or so...but I do miss my little computer.
So for all of you out there who have my number, be expecting an email with the new one. It feels nice being able to contact people again.

Annoying brothers and moving

Well I finally finished with the cleaning of the apartment. I left it in pretty good shape, well I think I did, and hopefully my landlord thought the same. And I was sure to leave her with a note for all of my forwarding information and a list of things needing to be done in the house...like a leaky tap. It feels strange not living there anymore. And I still can't use my phone, the line was supposed to be switched over, but when I called on Friday they said that it might not be until the 7th of Feb.! At least I can still check my messages, but I would still like to be able to phone my friends, you know?

So this was a busy weekend, the family was staying down with us, we were getting DISH network installed, and I was supposed to go to the opera but couldn't find my season tickets anywhere. It was Jimmy's first time at the condo, he liked it, and I think that since he can see that Mr.3 and I have established a home he is more comfortable with the situation. It was amusing to watch Jimmy feed the ducks because he looked like a little old man sitting on the bench while feeding them, and then he had a goose get rather aggressive with him.
Now I made sure to lock the bedroom door that night because I wasn't sure if Jimmy was going to come in and visit when he got up in the morning and I didn't want him to see me naked. Not that Mr.3 and I were up to anything, but I prefer to sleep in the nude. So apparently he was up early in the morning, and in an effort to either give him a chance to snoop or help (but I doubt that) he started to unpack. So when I came downstairs I saw that he had started to unpack some of the decoration boxes. What concerned me was that I know that my vibrator (yes, I have one, my little red friend, but I haven't needed to use it since Mr.3 and I have been together) was in one of the boxes of pillows and decorations because we moved those ourselves and I didn't want the movers to see it. So later, after my family and the DISH installers guys had been in and out of the room, I decided to look at the boxes, to see what he had messed with and not only had he been in the box with the vibrator in it, but also the vibrator was out in the open on the floor! Who knows who saw it! How embarassing by proxy! And I am not sure how to address it with him, or even if he knew what it was. Any suggestions?

So apparently a smoking vacuum is a bad thing.

Last night, I am at the old apartment trying to get it clean so that my landlord can have it back for the weekend to paint and such...and I am trying to get a bunch of it cleaned before my Mom comes to meet me there to help clean because well...honestly the dirt and stuff all around was embarassing. So I am vaccuming trying to make a clean spot in the house, and I am traveling on over to the bedroom when I run over some yarn which quickly ravels around and around the brush in the vacuum. I turn it off and start to try to take out the yarn and the vacuum is smoking. Not a little, but a lot, I was lucky that it didn't start to spark or burst into flames but the end result would have been the same...I managed to blow out the motor on a fairly new vacuum, and couldn't finish cleaning the apartment.
So if you take into account, the vacuum, my tiredness and all of the stress from lately, hopefully you can understand my cracking at this point. When my mom came to the apartment I was in a ball on the floor, crying, having a nervous breakdown of sorts. Thank goodness she just took control because I was just worthless. We got a lot of the garbage taken out of the house, but there is a lot of cleaning to be done, which my Mom will work with me on later tonight. Fun all around. They left a vacuum at the new condo which we will use in the apartment to finish up, but I should probably look into getting a new vacuum, that is unless Mr.3 has one that I can mangle in time. This is the third vacuum in 5 years that I have managed to destroy somehow.

More lunch stories

So last Monday when I was at lunch with Shibley, the bug stayed in the office and answered phones. As I understood it, she was able to come but didn't because her stomach felt bad, or at least that is what she told me. When we got back she asked what we got to eat, etc..etc..and then made a snide comment to Kate that she had to stay and answer phones..oh boo hoo...I had to miss my class that day because she got to go to the lecture itself and I had to settle watching the web broadcast.
Anyway, today Amb. Edward Perkins was speaking on campus, and of course the bug went to the presentation (she just plans on going to all of them, at least when Beth was still here we worked something out, but June (the bug) just pouts about having to stay in the office if you want to go to something. Well when Linda was coming back from lunch she saw Kate and the bug walking with "I", the ambassador and the President of the University on their way to the luncheon in the ambassador's honor. Linda was funny about it because the bug was estatic that she was getting to go to the lunch and having this chance to hob-nob. She really freaks out over these things, but then again she comes from the social class of dinner parties and country clubs that she has let herself be miserable in her life just to keep that station. (Currently her husband, who she hates and has been married to for 30+ years is in Hong Kong "on business". Well he has been on business for over 2 months now and she has no idea when or if he is coming back. But she does live in a gated community and still plays tennis and bridge with the girls at the club. It makes one sick, it really does.) Back to the lunch...Kate came back about a half hour or so after the talk. Apparently everyone who was invited to the lunch showed and they didn't need any fillers for the table. And while "I" wanted to make everyone squish together to fit the two (an idea that Kate was not going to allow him to entertain) they didn't get to eat lunch with the group at all. Kate was cool with this, but the bug was "disappointed", she did still manage to get a free meal out of the deal by suggesting that they just add another meal to the campus order and they have it take out. But I found it to be a sort of divine justice that she wanted so bad to go to this lunch and lecture and didn't get to go to the lunch...ahh it is vengence for her whining.

speaking of whining, I love Linda to death, but why now is she complaining about not having any room for stuff? Last week she wanted to put one of her TVs from Outreach into the Zucker room, now I have just gotten that all cleaned out and I don't want it junked up again. Kate told her no, but she let her store the TV in the conference room. We would have put it in one of the storage closets but the cart that it is on is too big. Kate told her that the first complaint about space, and that room is tight to begin with, that it had to go back into Outreach's storage closet, where this TV has resided anyway for years. Well this morning there was supposed to be a committee meeting in that room and the TV had to be taken out of it. I brought it back to her storage area and she started to make comments (not anything angry but done in that matter of fact whiny way some people have) that originally the storage closet that all of the old computer stuff was in used to be all Outreach's. I'm sorry, but if it was Outreach's in the beginning, one, why did they lose it in the first place? And two, if they needed the fricking space so badly why did they wait years for someone to clean out the closets. Cleaning all of that out, all of the work that I have done in the storage areas and the conference rooms and such, was not something that was in my job description, but something that I did to make life easier around the center...and now is complaining that they need more space? They now have 3 shelves in the main supply closet, storage that they hadn't had for at least 10 years...geez...what is it with people sometimes?

Now I know that I shouldn't be hard on Linda, after all she has done so much for Mr.3 and I with letting us live in her father's condo and all, and that with her father taking a turn for the worse, but I have little patience for anyone whining about something that they didn't even think of having before now now.

So tonight my Mom is staying with us, she came into town for a meeting and she has agreed to help me clean my old apartment...little does she know how awful it really is, she shouldn't have agreed. Oh well, good for me, not for her.

Lunch with Shibley

So today is the first day of this year's lecture series at work, and because they needed some fillers for the luncheon, both Mr.3 and I got to go lunh with Shibley Telhami. He seems like a pretty nice guy. Unfortuately, he didn't get to eat much of his lunch because people kept asking him questions, and while the questions were good (on the whole) you still have to feel sorry for him not being able to finish eating.
"I" was a scream, Kate and I sat right across from him and he would start to figit like a schoolboy when he began to get bored.
One thing that I noticed...of the four women who were there, Kate wore a conservative pin-striped suit, Rebecca wore a dark blue pant set, Joana wore a white sweater set, and what did dear old Delal wear, a low cut bright red dress. Why is it that women are afraid to wear color? Has there been any research on the impressions of personality of women for what color they wear to events. I know that my mom sent me some article off of yahoo saying that some rabbi in Israel accused all women that wear red as being prositutes. But I think that color needs to be infused into the workplace more. I commanded that room without saying a word.

Like I could stay mad more than an hour

After writing the previous post, I knew that I would have to a least call Mr.3 before I went down with my parents. I even took notes of what I felt needed to be said, with little reminders not to give in and such. I was about to call, as in my hand was reaching for the phone when he called me. I asked him how his walk was and he told me that he had left his inhalor either in the computer lab or in my parent's car. I was going to leave a little early from work (about a half hour) so he wanted me to stop by and give him a kiss. Just the request for the kiss and I totally melted.
The inhalor wasn't in the lab, but my mom had it, so I met them and then drove the inhalor to the resturant. All that was said about the situation was that the both of us were a little cranky today. I was completely okay with that, more than okay, wonderful with that.
The dinner went well, more expensive than what my parents had wanted but they enjoyed and anytime we can get my Dad to try something new is always a good day.
Later that evening, my car died---which actually lead to a mini-breakdown that evening (Mr.3 just held me, it was perfect). So Saturday morning was spent at PepBoys getting my altenator replaced...it was a 4 hour ordeal. And I was so tired that I was punchy. But we tried to keep ourselves occupied and walked around to some of the shops nearby. Mr.3 bought me a Queen record...he is soo sweet. It makes me twitterpated just to think about it.
And here I go with all of the goofy lovey dovey stuff, but I find it kind of scary how much I love Mr.3. Last night I was ironing his new dress shirts singing "I've got the world on a string" is that normal?

I need to rage

and you are now my unwilling victim.

Mr.3 and I almost had a fight, but it was one of those fights where I told him just to leave the office before I snapped and said something that I really shouldn't have. So it is like we are fighting but haven't said anything yet.

Mr.3 cannot drive, and I am not sure if I had mentioned this before, but when he was deployed and later injured, while in hospital the hospital staff gave him a medication that they knew (it was in his records) that he was allergic to. He started to have seizures because of it. Now it is a national guideline that if you seizure you can not drive, so his liscene has been suspended until he can prove that he has been seizure free for at least 3 years. I do not fault him in any way because of that. Every morning he comes to school with me, but also he has to be at the school too. Every night I pick him up from work at 11 pm because I know that the buses do not run that late. Now he has to be at work at 3. Before classes started, I was able to work my schedule to take the time out to drive him to work (but that was only one week before classes have started), now with me going to school, I have to be more careful about time that I take off. And my boss doesn't really care about me leaving periodically, but my own personal work ethic does. I am not under any obligation to give him a ride to work, I have when I can, but I am under no obligation to do so.

So this brings us to today...first of all, I hurt, and bad. I lifted something last night and my back has been spasming all day, walking hurts, sitting hurts, I just plain hurt and pain medication is not helping it. So it is about 1:30 and I realize that there is no way that I want to walk out to my car and back today to take him to work. So I start to look up the university shuttle schedules for him, because the weather is incredibly foggy/smoggy and walking outside hurts your lungs. But with the way that the office was working this afternoon I didn't get a chance to go down the hall and talk to him about until just before 2, plenty of time for him to walk and or take the shuttle--it is about a 15-20 minute walk to his work from the campus. So I tell him that I really don't want to walk down to my car and back, that my back is hurting too much to do so, and he gets all snippy with me because I should have told him earlier...I told him that I was busy but that I did manage to get the shuttle schedule for him..and then he starts (starts mind you because I was not going to let him go on about it) about how I need to tell him these things ahead of time and blah blah blah. I'm sorry but did he ever ask me to give him a ride? No. When i told him that I didn't want to walk to my car and back because I hurt, he tells me just to leave early from work. That is a lovely option (please note my sarcasm here) I love just leaving work whenever I fucking feel like it, forget about me needing to make any money or work my hours or anything, because it really isn't that important in the long run. I'm sorry but him finally contributing one paycheck does not mean in any way that I should take my job lightly.
So I can see the train wreck of a fight coming on, because I am not going to budge on this one, so I tell him just to leave before I get angry and start saying things that I shouldn't. Which of course he starts asking me what I am going to say...look I don't want to get into a fight over something that we have already discussed before. I don't want to get into a fight at work, and I don't even want to fight at home, one, because he pouts for hours afterwards, and two my parents are visiting, and all I want to do is present to them the happy situation that we are living, not get into a fight over something stupid insignificant thing because he is pushing for a bit of drama. Last week he told me that I was being "withdrawn" from him. Well, I'm sorry, I have been stressed and I don't want to take anything out on him, also I am not used to having someone even around who cares about what I think. This is a new thing for me, and if I am a little withdrawn in the effort of preventing stupid little fights then you are just going to have to be a little patient with me. It doesn't mean that I don't love him any less, but I don't want to jeopardize anything over a misunderstanding. Because yes, the insecure part of me is worried about screwing up somehow and losing him.

When I told him to leave, I told him that it would just give us a chance to calm down, and he storms off saying that it wouldn't. Damn it! It just makes me so angry! I am his girlfriend, not his chaffaur! Where does he get off just assuming that I am going to be there all the time to drive him somewhere. I know that one day I won't be able to, that is why I keep pushing him to get his new ID, so he can get his bus pass and stuff. Find your own fucking ride! or at least have the courtesy to ask me sometimes, especially if you know that I am at work, and that I don't feel comfortable leaving work all the time. And I didn't want to get upset, I didn't, but now I am, and trying not to cry at my desk...and I know that I have to call him at work and handle this now because my parents and I are going to go to the resturant this evening, and I am not having any awkardness during that meal.

See the thing is, I know that we are both tired...getting to bed at midnight and then getting up at 6, coupled with the flu, and the move...we are both tired and frayed to the breaking point. All I want to do is sleep and relax, but I can't right now because there is so much to do. And if he starts telling me that I need to be doing more than what I already am anymore I am going to snap, because I am doing the best that I can with his worries and my worries both upon my back.

moving with the flu

awful, awful I tell you! I forced Mr.3 to go to the doctor on Friday morning, and we found out that he has the flu...a few hours later it hit me hard, but I was fighting it off for a couple days beforehand so that I could take care of him.

the new condo is wonderful, we spent last night it in, although I didn't sleep too well, it could be excitement or sickness, who knows. And the 3 day gradual moving thing works really really well, seeing that both of us need to take breaks because of the flu. Tuesday morning the movers are going to come and take the furniture, and although we have only done 5 trips so far, I think that we can get the majority if not all of my stuff (minus the furniture pieces of course) moved before that time.
My apartment however, is disgusting...the amount of cleaning that I have to do before I would be willing to let my landlord show the apartment to anyone is astronimical.

well I think that is all for the moment, I just thought that I would check in since the next time that I have internet access will be wednesday...till then, hope that I don't break my back (or Mr.3's back) moving!

working...hardly

so today I have managed to do just enough to make it look like I am accomplishing something. Most of the day has seemed like I have been just waiting for one class or another to start. In fact now I am only blogging to pass the time before my Lingustics class.

This morning when I came in there was a thick layer or dust and crud that came from the ceilings...the workmen were finishing up the fire sprinkler project in our office. I spent the first hour of my day cleaning that junk up, and I think it is making me sick, as my head keeps pounding when I am in the building. So while I was cleaning off all of the breakroom supplies I had to go into the bathroom to wash some of the cups. The Bug couldn't find me to ask a question (I wasn't answering the intercom) so she went into the bathroom to find me. Granted yes, the question was something that only I could answer, but the significant thing is that SHE FOLLOWED ME INTO THE BATHROOM TO PESTER ME!!! THERE ARE NO SAFE PLACES ANYMORE!! Good thing I wasn't on the can, but even if I was, I think that she would have asked me anyway. In other places this would be called stalking, but here, it is an everyday occurance with the bug.

In happier news, JB will not be temping for the Languages and Literature department, apparently she is very happy with her job at the Granite School District....but just give them time to fire her, we all know that it will happen. I am still going to stake out the handicapped spots in the parking lot as I suspect that JB's spawn is still parking there. Jason (who is in a wheelchair) was telling me that he couldn't find any spots yesterday, and I just had this funny feeling that the spawn probably contributed to that. I will wage war with that family, one way or the other.

Well I better go get ready for class, I hope that it isn't too bad this time. I do have quite the rant ready for you about Sluglett's class yesterday, which you can all look forward to.

Day one of classes

So we didn't have Turkish class yesterday, but I have homework to do, which I will probably start trying to do in a few minutes here at work as I seem to have the majority of the fires put out. But then again it is only 9:30.

I went to my LIngusitcs for Educators class yesterday and while the class seems cool, the teacher gives me the absolute creeps. He wears glasses but looks down through them, he doesn't look people in the eye but rather at their feet. He even does the whole shifty eye thing. Part of me wished that he had some sort of visible twitch so that it could explain his strange behavior, but there isn't, he is just weird. He also has an online chat hour...this disturbs me, he already looks like he has very little human contact and plays Everquest way to much, and that chat hour just confirms it for me.
When we came into the class he had us move into a circle, stating that he believed in the whole King Arthur round table thing. Then in order for us all to "get to know one another" he had us read one sentence out of a news article that he had passed out, and state our names and why we were taking the class...this took an hour, and was deathly boring...I did write a poem out of the whole thing, which I will type below, it isn't anything much and it is rough, but I am going to subject you to it anyway....


Day one of the Lingustics for Educators class
the room arranged in a circle
to create a stronger community of students
each of us are floating alone
we speak our names
tell why we are here
and begin the mundane task of getting to know one another
everyone just listens to their own heart beating
their breath rattling in their ears
boredom falls....
"Why did our vocal cords evolve?" he asks
finally a sensible question
he lets out a strangled sob, a wookie war cry
"is it to protect ourselves?"
the overachievers say "yes" and theorize about survival of the fittest
trying to please the instructor
I am silence

what if our speech evolved
to give us something to listen to
or to give us a reason to think out loud?

forever again

it has been hectic...getting ready for school, getting ready to move, and managing Mr. 3's new job (scheduling alone time keeps getting harder and harder)

today however was rough, the first day of the semester always is, but add in your own classes on top of that and everything gets five times worse. At the moment my brain is so fried that I am blogging simply for an opportunity to get my head back together..

First of all, the stupid freshman questions....yes you are in the O-S-H building, we call it Osh, welcome....second, the easiest way to find the WPRA is to following the HUGE signs posted in the hallway, but if you really can't read a sign at this late stage in your life, sure I'll direct you out of pity. geez.

Second, scheduling problems, one classroom is too small but at that time when there is absolutely no room in the university for a change of venue...

But perhaps the most annoying thing of today is the constant calls from the bug asking the most stupid questions...and they are the same questions over and over again! she is the academic advisor if she can't figure out the cross-listing thing by now... the other day I was looking up a class roll and noticed that Mr.3, instead of being slated as the graduate student that he is, is listed as a Junior. I had him call the registar, and they told him that the advisor had changed his status...my question is...what in the hell did she think that she was doing? Beth had everything set up perfectly and she had to mess around...hopefully it will get fixed but who knows how many students records she has screwed up at this point.

other horrific news, there is a rumor that JB might be temping for the Languages and Literature department for a month or so...a month is more than enough time for her to re-file and re-arrange an entire office...when Mandy came back to help train Kate, she couldn't find anything in her office. So if this bit of gossip is true it has two implications: one...that she will visit, and her coming into this office makes me phyisically ill, it is bad enough with her spawn wandering around (Mr.3 has a class with her, he's devastated) but more importantly two: if she is temping again, it means that she has lost yet another job...another! you would think that a woman with a 12 page resume of jobs would think that there might be a slight problem with her work style/ethic/attitude and try to fix it. But then again if you think that you are always right...you always remained screwed.

the lush strikes again!

Last tuesday, the 21st, Linda had a holiday gathering at her house. Her husband Bill had smoked a Turkey and the food turned out really well...it was a needed party for her because she needed just to kick back with friends, it has been so difficult for her later. However as with any party with Linda there is always a copious amount of wine involved...which is fine, but when you mix it with "the bug" it always brings out the most ....ahhh...interesting things from her. Now despite Linda telling me that the bug can really drink, after half a glass of wine she is so obnoxious (way beyound her normal sober level of annoyingness) that you just want to beat the woman. After her second glass she was doing that thing, where only really drunk people do, which is ask other people to guard their drink (and militantly guard their drink) when they go to the bathroom. After the third or fourth drink she started butting into conversations with stories that contain wayyyy toooo much information. For example...Isil, Rebecca and I were talking in the corner about subjects pertaining to sex, trading secrets that sort of things, when the bug comes up and announces (and I use that word because the entire room heard it) that she has 2 sex books at home and that I was more than welcomed to borrow them. As she continued I found myself alone with her (I don't know how both Rebecca and Isil managed to get away, but that was really cruel to leave me like that) The bug started telling me stories of how she tried to rekindle her love life with her husband that I suspect that she has never, ever been happy with, but loves the country club status and lifestyle too much to leave him. One story was that she invited him home for lunch and greeted him naked while laying atop one of her Turkish rugs....the strange part of this story was that she placed the rug on top of their bed. I'm sorry but if you are willing to roll yourself out on the rug, the rug should just stay on the floor, how silly is that? Anyway, there are a lot more instances of stories that she told, all equally scarring to my psyche.

but wait, there is more...this Monday "I" took everyone in the office (including Mr.3) out to lunch to meet his daughters. Somehow the 2 of us ended up across the table from the bug. Now her want of properity really bothers me to begin with, but when your boss is taking you out to lunch, the last thing you do is order the most expensive item on the menu...it is common curteousy. Towards the beginning of the meal, Linda suggested maybe sharing a bottle of wine (which is fine to suggest and I know that Linda would have been willing to pay for it if "I" didn't want to go to that expense), the bug literally jumped to grab the beer and wine list out of "I" hand, and then of course she is picking things from the bottom of the list..and on most wine lists that is the most expensive...and maybe it seems silly to complain about it, but if she can't afford to buy it why make your boss? Also keep in mind that this is a lunch and that everyone was going make to work afterwards...but that didn't stop her from guzzling down 3 glasses of wine. (She reeked all day, who knows what students think of her)...of course with her alcohol consumption her level of annoyance goes up and I was ready to kill her by the end of the luncheon. While we were talking, Rebecca and Mr.3 were sharing memories for growing up in Germany and while the bug would ignore them during that time, anytime some alcoholic beverage was mentioned (which happens a lot when you are discussing German festivals and holidays) she would perk right up and ask questions and...ugh....even talking about alcohol and she starts to act like she is already been drinking...the sad thing is that I don't think that I really care if she has a drinking problem or not, I just want her to stop annoying me.

Xmas and a funeral

I know I know, it has been forever.

I had a nice holiday weekend. But let's begin with Joane's funeral...and I know that it isn't nice to trash a funeral...but still...when you are giving a eulogy, most people talk about the person themselves, not their faith in God and how they made sure that her family followed the principles of "the church". In fact I heard more about Jesus than I did Joane, and that isn't fair, she was a wonderful woman. Mormon hymns scare me...there was this beautiful song called "His Hands" that someone sang but when you listened to the lyrics it was graphic descriptions of Christ's cruxifiction...I think that the lyrics would give small childern nightmares. At the gravesite we sang Christmas carols because that was Joane's wish as this is her favorite time of the year. All of her childern wore holiday clothing instead of black...which was very fitting.

Mr.3 came down with me to my parents for the funeral and Christmas. As we were not allowed to stay in the same room together, I had lobbied before hand to be allowed to spend one night with him with lots of silly provisos like we would be fully dressed the whole time, yada yada yada. But honestly, who really wants to get it on when your parents are sleeping across the hall. Anyway, I had managed to secure Christmas Eve, but when we got there, Jimmy announced that I could stay all the nights we were there with Mr.3, which and don't get me wrong, I liked, but definitely wasn't expecting. Jimmy was playing the situation off as that it was something that he was "allowing"us to do, but the reality was that he hadn't cleaned his room and I couldn't of stayed in his room even if I wanted to.
On Christmas Eve eve my Mom's kitchen sink stopped up. Mr.3 spent most of the 24th trying to unclog it, but to no avail. At about 6pm, I could sense that my Mom was going to freak out soon as she had 2 hours to finish wrapping, make the neighbor's gifts, make dinner, and find some way of getting the dishes done. So I took over, Mr. 3 cooked the dinner, Mom wrapped the gifts and the neighbor's stuff, Jimmy delivered the gifts, and I made the main bathroom the auxillary kitchen and washed all of the dishes in the bathtub. Can I just tell you that 3 hours of hanging over the side of a tub on your knees is not a pleasant experience...my back still aches from the whole ordeal. Everything got done, and that was the important thing.

for the next installments to come expect some stories about the bug being a lush at Linda's party...stupid statements made from friends, and unneccasary paranoia...

Super senior, I am not!

So today on the radio I heard the local morning show mention [BG]'s name, as the advisor for the Jordan High drama club, and can I just tell you how happy this makes me. For starters, [B] and I were very close friends in high school, I had a huge crush on him and he knew it the whole time, but we never got together, the friendship was paramount. A couple of months ago I met him again at one of Colin's performances. The entire time we talked he bragged about his kid and kept reminding me of his wife --who was sitting next to him, literally the girl next door who he married less than 2 months after returning from his mission---the same girl who ended up pregnant with a month or 2 of marriage, and how that happened is unknown since they lived in his parents basement when they were first married...anyway, after this meeting I was furious with him, not at any point did he bother to ask how I was or what I had been up to in the past seven years since we left high school. But after this morning, I realized that he hasn't left high school. "Advisor" positions in the drama club were alway reserved for those people who had graduated but still hung out with the club, super seniors as it were...except [B] is a super senior seven times over. How pathetic is that? And yes, I rejoice in this, yes, it can be seen as petty, but it was the icing on the cake for this morning.

In other news, Mr.3 and I signed the lease agreement on Linda's Dad condo this weekend. Most of the weekend was spent with Mr.3 and I passing the same cold between us. However, yesterday I was really sick and had to go home early from work. My fever finally broke about 11:30 last night, and I feel much better now. Also last night, we went to the Marriot so that Mr.3 could sign the job offer letter. He starts next Monday. The evening (even with me being sick) was pretty good with the pre-celebratory nookie and the post-celebratory cheese fries at the Training Table.

This morning, they were working on cleaning the carpets in the office. So with the work being done on the vents in the hallways, the fan for the carpets, and all of the doors being open it is really cold in here. Currently I am typing with gloves on, it is slow going, but it works.

stressful friday

I have had to take a stomach pill this afternoon because of stress build-up, and the dam pill ain't working yet. Not that it has been one particular thing that has been stressful, just lots of other little things....e-grading, lazy professors, model arab league, etc...We had a meeting today for MAL, DJ was extrememly abrasive and if he would just calm down things could be fixed so easily, but no...not with him, that would be the easy way out. And Mushira complained to "I" that I didn't do my job correctly because her staff screwed up...but at least I have proof that I did everything right, thank heavens for copy machines.

Last night I went and saw Beauty and the Beast with Libby's mom. It was good, but I am still in favor of the movie...animation just has so much more energy.

Really the bright spot in my day has been Mr.3, even with him not feeling well. He has caught my change-of-season cold. When I was leaving last night to go to the play, he told me that he loved me and that he knew I had been wanting to say that to him for days. It was a wonderful moment, and even in the face of the grief of yesterday, I think that comment made my year, decade, whatever...because I have been wanting to tell him that, but I worry that it would be too soon and that it would scare him off...so I have kept quiet, painfully so, but I am glad that it is out of the way in the open. It is a weight off of my shoulders, lessened my doubt. Wednesday evening he finally met Libby, while he was in the restroom we were talking about him, obviously. I mentioned that at times I wondered why he was even with me. Libby's response was, "well, why wouldn't he?" That helped too, if anyone was going to be brutally honest with me, it's Libby, and when I need that slap back to reality comment, she is the first to give it. Not that I have low self-esteem, far from it, but I am not immune to those moments of self-doubt.

Joana

Joana, Kelly's mom, died in her home very early this morning. They brought her home last night so that she could be with her family. It is hitting me harder than what I expected, and I think that I am making a valient effort not to cry at work today, but I will be leaving at 11 today so that I can cry very loudly and do that whole wailing thing that women seem to be so prone to. I think cleaning might also make me feel better, so I think that I will do some of that this afternoon, goodness knows that the house needs it.

how many...

friggin' times to have to explain things to that woman! This is the fourth time that she has called me with the same question! If someone is listed under a special topics course, it shows up as having the same course if you take more than one in a semester! You have to call the registrar's office and have them override the system...God, she's thick! Then the bug complains that it shows up funny on the DARS reports, of course, you have to do an exemption for each one of those courses that a student takes in order for it to count on their degree form...she is the academic advisor, this is her job! But no, every single frigging time she comes across this problem she calls me about it, and each time I tell her, go and look at my undergraduate file, Beth had to make the exemptions for me on multiple occasions and she documented everything!
UGH!

it's wonderful!

we saw the condo yesterday and while it is much much bigger than what we need, we can move all of our stuff in and not have to consolidate. Linda is going to give us the condo for $600 a month rent, includes utilities, with a 6 month guarentee that we can live there before they try to sell it. they will also give us a fee for showing the condo when that time comes. So I have been placing furniture in the condo for the past day or so...it will be a lot easier when I see Mr.3's stuff. We can move in at any time, but I think that it is wise to wait until after the beginning of the year...I have to give a month's notice anyway on my apartment so I can take a long time to move, which I like. That month is going to be hectic, moving and starting grad school, on top of the normal stuff that I have....I can't wait!

Joana, Kelly's mom is really sick...well she has been sick for a while...but they only give her a few days to live..and while I like Joana, I am really worried about how this is going to affct my mom and my little brother. Jimmy has never had to deal with a death of someone close to him, and he has already broken down a couple times in the past day or so. Antoher reason that I am glad that I am not at my parent's now, I don't think that I could deal with him at all.

haven't blogged in a while..sorry

This weekend was interesting only in the fact that it was the first night since being an item that Mr.3 and I slept in separate beds. And not much slept was to be had. Later today we are going to look at a condo that Linda is wanting to rent out (it's here father's and he was recently moved into a home), and then there are some other places that we are going to look at. Last night we talked about financial stuff...it was odd...I always considered my debt to be my debt and the idea of someone being willing to help me pay that off...whoa...that is out of this world. I am really excited about the prospect of moving in with him on a permanent basis...I have never been as happy with anyone else in my whole life as I have been with him.

Enough sappy stuff...let's discuss the impending doom that hovers over the head of "the bug" here at the wonderful land of "the MEC". Now, I know that this electronic grading thing is going to be a bitch...we have already had our first problem...a professor left the country, expecting his TA to do the grading...of course, the professor left without granting him access to enter in grades. I am the only one in the department who has been trained, I am the only one in the department who has access to view the grades...but the bug seems to think that one, this is her area of responsiblity and it isn't, and two that she has access to all of this stuff...which she doesn't because I refuse to fill out the forms for her lazy ass. And I just got off the intercom with her, and she called someone who I said I needed to all, and the guy has to fill out some form and fax it to her...fine, but I am just waiting for her to call back asking me if I have the form...dammit, it just pisses me off! I handle grades not her. She won't do her god damn job, pushing her work load onto me, but then she has to take my work!? I don't think so! UGH! I think that she is beginning to make my stomach cramp just like JB did.

toilet paper is difficult for some people

so just a few minutes ago, I'm in the stall, go to reach for some toilet paper, and the numbnuts who used it before me had managed a 12 sheet long strip of toilet paper, but not manage to get a whole sheet of the stuff. Kind of like when cello tape splits. I mean, come on, it is toilet paper, how difficult can it really be?

things are progressing nicely. Last night Mr.3 and I went out to dinner with my mom, Kelly and Doug. It was a good opportunity for them to talk and stuff before the festivities of this weekend with my Dad's birthday party. Both Kelly and my mom have asked if we are going to get married--or well dropped hints at it, and it just reminds me that I have lived in Utah for wwaaaayy to long, I have friends that meet one day and marry the next. So maybe I am not the defunked one here with my 3 week relationships, because any longer than that and people ask about wdding bells. See, conventional in the US is not convential here. Strange strange strange. And, much to my great pleasure and happiness, Mr.3 and I are in the same mind on this issue.

however, earlier today, while typing an email to my mom about my father's opinion on this whole situation I had this incredibly powerful sense of deja vu. It was something about the wording of the email, and the placement of the drink container on my desk that triggered it, but I think that I dreamed about writing that email a long long time ago, somewhere around the time that I first started working here. It's a little creepy.

as predicted...

Mr.3 read my post from yesterday and we talked a little about it, he seems to feel the same way and is pretty sure that I won't mess things up..but you never know..

today has been a fairly boring day at work. Nothing too exciting, although yesterday we received a huge check from SaudiAramco, so hopefully we will be able to get James Baker as a speaker for the lecture series next Spring. "I" was so cute when I handed him the check, he hopped up and down, hugged me, and then ran across the hall to tell Linda.
One of these days I am going to kill the bug. Today she has been giving me little "projects" to do, and just as in the spirit of JB, they take more time to explain to me then for her to actually do. One, early this morning, was a student in which if she had actually listened to what the student had said, she could have handled it all by herself, but she needed to come into me, to dictate and make herself look important. It drives me nuts, because on the hierarchy scale in the office, we are on the same level..nothing changed in that relationship except the things that she is in charge of. And now she wants me to punch holes in four pieces of paper and post them on the board in the hall...which golly gee...I am so swamped that it will have to wait until I am finished blogging. Earlier I was playing with her hole punch and it burst, sending confetti bits all over me. "I" happened to be at my desk talking on the cell phone when it happened and had to hold in the laughing. I think that the most demeaning aspect of being given projects to do is when those projects are so trivial that they take 2 seconds to complete. How is that helpful to anyone but the person dictating for the sake of puffing up their ego over having someone to dictate too? I sense clashes in the future and possible bloodshed, when it gets closer to that time I will be open for bets on the cage fight between the two of us.

weekends are just too short

I enjoyed this weekend, even with the untimely addition of my period added into the mix.
The natural domesicity that I find with Mr.3 is infinitely comfortable, and in such a little disconcerting...he is perfect, his faults are not faults at all but little character points that make me love him more and more. And yes, I said love, that is what is frightening...I feel like I am falling in too fast, I find myself wanting to say things that I know are way to soon to be said. I can imagine him reading this and freaking, please don't, you were warned that this was my head you were entering into, I claim immpunity. I think that I worry that I will screw this up somehow. today would be the 2 week anniversary of our first lunch together, I guess that you could call it a date. My longest relationship was like 3 weeks...but I have never been committed to anything like I am this, and I have never enjoyed every second spent with a person like this.
There was a question about the lipstick and eyeglasses story...it deals with a naughty librarian fantasy of Mr.3's...and it was fun. On Saturday night we got invited to a wine and cheese party at one of the professor's houses in my department. It was nice to socialize, show Mr. 3 off, and have an opportunity to wear fishnets and heels in public.
An odd moment, that was appreciated greatly by me: the "ohh!" of surprise when while taking a shower together I could put my palms on the shower floor.

Chef BoyArdee and Remember the Alamo

This weekend I am staying home, the more time to snuggle with Mr.3. We have become cutely domestic this past week, for example...last night we made a grocery list, today we ate lunch together which consisted of leftover macaroni from the night before, we ate it out of the same container.

I have also taken to showing him off whenever I can. Today we went down to the bookstore (for a legitimate errand) and he met Paul and Becky. I even told Kani about him, although I admit that part of me wanted to spite him, petty I know.
On the subject of Kani, what an awful letter he wrote. I expect the poorly written and rambling op-ed piece to be put up on Kurdish Media. Hopefully they won't publish it, but I suspect that they publish just about anything they get offered, no matter how bad.

Jack still has issues with Mr.3. I confronted him today about it, and part of it is due to Mr. 3 threatening his position in Model Arab League, the other part is in fact, jealousy. Yes Jack is gay, but I am his hag, and Mr. 3 infringes on this territory. I was hoping that it was just an ego thing between the boys and not to do with me, too much to hope. I also lost the bet other Jack's reaction with Mr.3, a favor is due that involves lipstick and eyeglasses..long story

Contentment

I true test came today. The fair Richard/Abdullah came into the office, and all I thought about was Mr.3. I have worried that I am the type to use someone and then disgard them when I get bored, which usually happens rather fast. The more that I am with Mr.3 the more intriqueing he becomes, the more I feel that I have known him for all of my life.

Jack, on the other hand is not taking it very well, as his fag hag has become distracted by someone who intimidates him intellectually. but he has promised to try and give Mr.3 a chance.

the most distracting thing that I have found is not that he is working just down the hall, but that I can smell him on my skin and feel the faint impressions of his fingers on my neck. Time moves off kilter when you are in this state. every few seconds with that person happen all to fast, stolen moments. Everything else in your life just seems oppressive, work and life outside of that sole person becomes more restricted and dull.

for those who are waiting to hear the gossip

well, there has been demand for further details about Mr.3, one request was his real name-Mike-and that will be the last time you will see it written.

this weekend at my parents was wonderful...but kind of funny as we were flirting/getting to know you the whole time, all the while under the watchful gaze of my parents..who love him. Jimmy had an amazing ability to come and bug me at the worst moments. Last night we drove back up to Salt Lake. the weather was bad this weekend, so we had to wait until the pass was clear. He had locked himself out of his friend's house (and his friend was trapped down south because of the weather) so he stayed at my house. and..well...after talking and some funny attempts to get over that awkward stage of who is going to make the first move..we got things straightened out..let's just say that that 4 year celibacy thing is over.

and to add to the twitterpation thing, he is wandering around campus today and comes in periodically. so there have been a couple walk-by make-outs. tonight, he is making dinner. well I am very very happy, and I blush all the time. and now I am the object of office-gossip.

twitterpation?

Not sure. So the past 2 days Mr. 3 has spent probably 5-6 hours with me and countless emails back and forth. And he is coming down for Thanksgiving (I couldn't bear the thought of him all alone) anyway, people in the office say there are sparks, I am not sure what to think, but I like him a lot and if anything I have a really good friend. You know, I think that I am a rather boring person, but I seem to manage to have incredibly long conversation with random people, so maybe I am not as boring as I feel. or...I just annoy everyone and they are too nice to tell me..

as promised, buying an IPOD with my boss.

Don't get me wrong, i love "I' to death, but he is one of those scatterbrained people, brilliant but a little ditsy with things. Anyway, there is this website that he loves with Arabic music, he listens to it all the time, and on occasion Kate and I have been pulled into his office to sing along..silly, but normal for around here. Last Friday he decided that he wanted to record the songs that he listens to and play them anywhere at anytime. So he went down to the U. bookstore and bought a digital voice recorder. which was really nice and it also became my job to figure out. but it is just a voice recorder and the sound quality was shit. We told him that what he really wanted was an IPOD, so I went down with him to the bookstore to make an exchange. He insisted that he handle everything, fine, but man, he was just on one. He was introducing himself to everyone under the sun and trying to negoiate deals and such....behavior that would have been fine in a bazaar but more like a circus in a store in Middle America. He kept saying money is no pbject----never never never say that to a clerk in a store..he only had a vague idea of what he needed and they were trying to sell him things that he would never use. that excursion was easily $500, not to mention him talking to the coupon vendor people in the store and buying there book thingys...that was $30 down the hole in which I again get to figure them out. I have 2 now..and he bought truffles for the office that was probably another 20-30. I guess if you have the money, spend it, but wow, that was a ride. Later in the day he prided himself on how he handled the whole transaction with me only saying a few words...those words being.."he wants an IPOD, 40 gig, with a car adaptor and a voice adaptor" This is something that he won't use, and can't figure out..well he can but it is just easier to have Kate and I do it. We did have fun figuring it out..

in other things..I went to the dentist this morning...NO MORE APPOINTMENTS FOR ME!!!! yeah, it is all finished! except today he hit a nerve or something, so my mouth hurts, and I stillhav ethe stroke victim thing going on this morning, I can't pronouce my own name right when I anser the phone...I hope the novacaine wears off soon.

and my knee doesn't hurt!!

I was worried that it might be since the last time I taught kurdish wedding dances it hurt to walk for a couple of days...goofy knee dance..all in all it went really well.

other than that, not too much to say. Today was looking to be pretty damn boring, but Mr.3 (who might actually read this every once in a while so he will remain nameless) came by and we just talked for something like 2 hours, which was very enjoyable. It is very interesting how much you can learn about someone just from small things that they drop in conversation. I am not sure how I am doing flirting wise, but we seem to be heading in a pretty solid friendship zone.

and today is also a short day-or it just feels like one. I had nothing to accomplish today, and I have actually made a lot of progress on a project that no one but myself cares about but if I do it it will impress everyone. In lieu of lunch I am leaving at 4. Mom is in town for a meeting and I am going to go for an early dinner with her and maybe some errands..yes, I know, the excitement...can you handle it? But maybe I will leave you with a teaser for what is to come tomorrow..."I" and the IPOD, an episode of pure hilarity.

oh, too funny..

so I have a stat counter thing on the blog and every once in a while I check it to see if anyone besides myself reads this. Well if someone does an internet search and my site comes up it will tell me what keywords they used. So apparently someone in Lahore Pakistan did a search (and looked at my site!) using the keywords "turkish fucking girls"...maybe my site is racier than I thought.

today looks to be a fairly quiet day. Last night I went to see "3 sisters" by Anton Chekov (Libby was the lightboard operator and I got free tickets) it was very very sad, very Russian...very very Chekov. I liked it though. Tonight I am going to go and teach a local bellydance toupe Kurdish wedding dances steps. This will be my second time teaching them. They are a really cool group, the focus less on the entertainment aspect of bellydance and teach their audiences about the history of the dances themselves, which I like. When I used to perform the group I was with focused on the cabaret aspect of it, in the trashy sense, than of the sensual side of it. So sorry boys, Delal no longer performs in public ;)

On the work front, "I" in his new 'every day is a good day' philosophy bought truffles for the office and anyone who comes by...it must have cost him a lot, but since the candy dish lives on my desk so does this tray and man, the smell of chocolate is overpowering...so much that they don't even sound appetitizing..and me not wanting to eat chocolate is really odd.
this weekend is MESA (middle East studies association) and before the bug changed jobs within the department she was going to go. but when she switched to acedemic advisor "I" said that she couldn't go. a fit was thrown and he decided to let her go. fine fine..I am the only one in the office who isn't going and I really want to. on monday I will be the sole person here. however the bug informs me today that she is not going to go because she can't afford to (the center paid for her ticket). this isn't a spur of the moment thing, she waited until 2 days before she goes to tell everyone? So now, on Monday, it will be me and the bug. She is going to be annoying me all day, uck.

Hot Chocolate

The other day, the only reason why I got up and went to work was because I knew that I could get hot chocolate in the office. Silly reason I know, but in the mornings it can be a pretty heated discussion with myself to get moving. This summer JB complained and whined for almost a full week that she was craving hot chocolate. Did she do anything about it? No, just whined. So in an effort to be nice (I was still trying to at that time) I brought in some extra mix that I had from my home. This stuff wasn't the cheap stuff either. Anyway JB was happy and stopped whining. But when I got to the office yesterday, the hot chocolate container was gone. Now when we are out or even if it looks like we are low on something, everyone tells me...in the case of JB she would throw the empty items of whatever she needed on my desk. No one told me that we were out of hot chocolate, so my only conclusion is that someone stole it, most likely JB because she is an excellent scapegoat and also the primary suspect. I was pretty bummed. Today I brought some crappy brand stuff that I had gotten as an xmas gift last year, but I also brought some super nice stuff which is going to live in my desk. JB's daughter still hangs around and it wouldn't surprise me if she pinched it too.

I know that a lot of people were saddened when JB left, because my blog just wasn't that interesting anymore...but never fear! June will fill that spot pretty nicely. Now June has been here forever, and although she has annoyed me on occasion, she has always worked on the other side of the hall and wasn't in my face all the time like JB. But now that she has taken over Beth's job she is becoming a pretty constant annoyance, that I can't shake off. Apparently she is under the impression that I know how to do her job. I don't, and I don't want to know. Beth would come and talk to me about stuff because we were friends. June on the other hand, seems to think that I am her new consultant and gopher. I beg to differ. We had a meeting the other day, June, Kate and I to talk about whose job was what, etc.. All I wanted to know was when June was going to take lunches so that I can work around that. Beth was my back-up on phones and when someone has to always answer the phones, having a back-up becomes very very important. After this meeting I was just filled with dread, because she doesn't seem to be catching on that she has to be accountable in the office.
One of the perks of our job is that if there is a lecture we are sponsoring, we get to go to it, on work time. Last week, because our events coordinator was sick, I had to set up an event about the whole Arafat thing. Now if I do all of the leg-work for setting up this huge panel discussion, I should get to see it, right? Well someone has to answer the phones, and June went without telling me that she was. So I had to stay in the office. I wasn't that upset in the beginning, but the more I thought about it the more annoyed I was. I set it up, I should have gone...but June hasn't gotten it yet, that we have to coordinate these things in the office, we can't just close up shop. Today there is a discussion group that I would like to go to. It isn't often that I want to go to these things..I very rarely go. But this morning I called June to ask if she would cover phones and she announces that she is going as well, fine great...but when was she going to tell anyone else in the office this? She also went to a meeting today and didn't tell anybody, what are we supposed to do if she has students who need to speak to her? Hummm? Maybe these things will be ironed out later but probably not...she and JB have the same personality. I should think of another name to call her, because she seems to have the same sixth sense that JB did when I was writing about her. She has been in here 4 times since I started writing...I think that I will call her "the bug" after the junebug which she seems to like.

Odd suscispion about the bug...I wonder if she drinks on the job. Either that or she uses a lot of mouthwash in the middle of the day. She came in a few minutes ago and wheeuw, I wasn't expecting that, it was very very strong. And it isn't a regular thing, but I have definitely smelt it on at least 2 other occasions.

damnit to hell and back...

so I finally got around to calling Hydro Air, wondering when they were going to start things up again....as december and those loan payments begin to loom closer...and do you know what I hear.."Oh, we are not going to do that anymore." Ah, yeah, well, when were they going to tell all of their workers who are "on call", like me who have been keeping their evenings open just for them? God, what happened to integrity? I wouldn't have been upset if I was told earlier, hell, even if I was told. I shouldn't have had to ask. At this rate I will be lucky if I manage to find a christmas time job at all! This is just hopeless! I am in a state where you are a cross between absolutely livid, and completely dispondant. What the hell am I gonna do now?!

Start over from the beginning, I guess.

how dinner and a day off went

Well on Thursday I left work around 3, and out of curiousity I checked my work email today, and well....I think a lot of the professors are so used to be being there every second of the day that they were a little disappointed. But it was heaven to leave work that early. Even though the weather up the pass was unpredictable (sunny, rain, heavy heavy rain, sleet, snow--a little car slipping action with that one--back to rain and then sunny) I smiled the whole way.

Dinner yesterday was later than what I had wanted it to be. According to my timetable -and yes I am that anal that I made a time table for cooking- I needed to start making the bread by 12:30 at the latest, but with waiting for my mom to get up and dressed and the go to the grocery store with me (parents paid for the food) I didn't get started until one. Disaster wise, it was very minimum...my dad burned some of the kebabs, but that really isn't my fault, I did burn my right hand and I have blisters, but at least I didn't drop anything or cut myself. But since I did burn my hand, I opted out of making the flaky griddle bread with cheese filing because my hand hurt so much, not to mention being behind on the time table. But even with that, we had an abundance of food (yummy leftovers for lunch today!), my father liked the food (he is Mr. "Foreign food, yuck!") in fact he had a second helping of rice--I almost died. So here was the menu--with everything being made from scratch:

-Hummus
-pita bread
-spinach and feta borek
-salad
-this eggy dish with tomatoes and green peppers that I can never remember the name of, but absolutley love
-beef kebabs
-rice pilaf
-rice pudding

I think that was all of it..either way I am the domestic queen!!

Later today, it is off to my dad's store...It's Family Shopping Night at Kmart! This is probably one of the biggest traditions in my family, and the reason why I did the Eid dinner a day early. Now if only I could get that frigging phone card to put my call through to the UK, this weekend would be perfect.

2 Unusual phonecalls...

Phone call number 1!

Recently my father has been cracking down on employees who aren't doing their jobs. He's the boss, that is what he is supposed to do. And honestly, he lets people get away with a lot before he does any offical write-ups. So this week he has done several...and whoever they are, boy are they mad, and petty vindictive. Someone called my mom yesterday from a pay-phone, and informed my mom that my father was having an affair with his sister (who apparently is "happily married with 2 kids"), and he advised my mom to make my father leave this woman alone. He wouldn't tell my mom his name or the sister that my father is supposedly messing around with. He just told my mom that my father "would know who it is". Ooohhh. scary. what a bastard. First of all the idea of my father having an affair, especially with an employee, just sends my mom and I into fits of laughter. But the deeper issue that disturbs my mom (and my dad) is that there is someone out there who because they were reprimanded at work, attempts to destroy my family. welcome to small town Utah. at the time my mom was in such shock that she didn't have time to be angry at the person, but if he calls back she is ready for them. as for suspects we have it down to 2. my mom worries that if whoever this person is, is willing to do this for being written up what they would do if say they were fired. back in the 80's, there were a couple instances where disgruntled Kmart employees had taken managers hostage...it was really bad. so as a safety precaution we haven't had our phone number listed for years, but when we moved, my dad decided that it should be alright to have it listed again. nope, guess not.

Phone call number2!!

4:40 am, the phone rings...who could it be? As I am staggering to the phone imagining that someone in my family had died or something...I answer only to find out that it is.......the suspense has to build up.....Erol! my ex-boyfriend and almost fiance from the small village of Koltepe, Turkey! Tah Da! Who else in the world would constantly forget that there is a time difference. But much to my surprise my turkish proved quite functional even that early in the morning, enough to find out that my family and his family were well, tell him all about Chuck's and Marco new children, and let him know that I wasn't sure if I was going to come to Turkey anytime soon. Not bad for a 2 minute phone call. He called back at 5 to ask another question about Chuck, and doublecheck to see if he heard me right that I was fasting, apparently he has forgotten I was Muslim. But jeez, I thought that I was doing well, he hadn't called in a couple of years...it took a couple of years for it to finally get across to him that I wasn't going to marry him, but I thought that it finally took. maybe he was hoping that with a little more time I would come around and run into his arms and say "oh Erol my darling, I should have married you when I was 19 and naive...and then I could have brought you to the US, where you could have gotten a low-level job like a janitor and have me support your lazy ass for the rest of your life!" I am sure that for those who don't know the whole situation, that may comments might seem a little heartless, afterall he is just a poor Kurdish village boy, why couldn't I just love him? The fact is that I did love him, very deeply once. I have a picture of him that lives in the lining of my CD case, every once in a while it falls out and I think of him, however love and marriage in the United States and love and marriage in Turkey is drastically different. and a young girl with a flashing neon "get your green card here" on my forehead, with no family to represent her, in what I found out later to be marriage nogioatiations is not prepared for such a thing, not to mention more personal matters that transpired between us.

however, I will probably write an email to Erol and to abayim Aziz seeing how they are. because even though Erol annoys me, I should try to keep in touch with people more...and yes Hiwa, I will call you, most likely Friday evening your time.

I am a wire pulled taut

ready to break.

It is amazing how one thing sets you off, and your patience for anything else is gone. Now I haven't taken anything out on anyone, but then again I am the only one here. And it is important to let you know, that I am not going to cry or anything, just cause someone physical harm. What a good day today would be for JB to visit..

Mushira (head of Lang & Lit) was the Catalyst. She was instructing one of her underlings to do something that was my job. And originally from my point of view, it looked like she was making major decisions about the arabic program that should be handled jointly. So I went to "I". Apparently he thinks that this is some sort of a battle with her, but it isn't...I just want him to make sure that she understands the status quo. Nothing too big, and I don't think that I would be half as mad at her if she hadn't hit me wrong from last week. If we see this as a battle, I won. Chalk one up to me.

But now, I am just on edge. I would really like to take a very long break, maybe actually take my lunch for once. Since Ramadan started, I haven't been doing anything lunch-wise just working straight through and racking up the comp time. I am sure that you are thinking, well, why don't you just take a break. I can't. I am the only one here. Linda and June, who don't normally answer the phones, and most of the time can't hear them anyway, are at lunch. Kate is in a meeting, and probably now at lunch with "I". And Rebecca has been awol for a day or so now, leaving little ol' me alone in the center to answer phones and generally keep the place running.

I keep telling myself just to sit and breath deeply, but it works for about 30 seconds, and then it is gone. When the phone rings I have to steel myself so that I can sound nice and all. Even when people I want to talk to come in (such as the fair Richard/Abdullah who lingered for quite a while attempting to make conversation) I just can't give them the attention that I want because I am as annoyed as I am. On the upside, I have been incredibly productive today, even with the server being down.
Hopefully, someone will come by soon to relieve me before I flip out on some poor unsuspecting person.

Today I did stuff and then I didn't do stuff. That is not a contradiction but rather a stark look at the life of a secretary...if I match conventional secretaries in their work load and production.

Instead of driving back last night from my parents, I decided to drive up this morning. But in order to be at work on time, it meant that I had to leave at 5am. I am the queen of taking 10 minutes in the morning to get dressed! So I guess that is one of the things that I did manage to do. I also made a new logo for the office, scheduled individual appointments for "I" entire seminar on ME politics class, backed up my computer, updated the website and the mailing lists...but still, it isn't a lot of things, and that took 2 things off of my "long list". Other than that, not too much else happening...the fair Richard/Abdullah has an awful Brando impressions, but I giggled and twittered in the effort of flirting. Danelle almost broke up with DJ, Catherine has stopped talking to Jack because he came out of the closet, and I met a really cool guy today named Mike. He is a new grad student in the Arabic program, and he just finished working as an analyst for the government. You should have heard him spout off about jordanian politics, and his grasp of the regional inter-relations...it was awe-inspiring (but not intimidating). Then I found out that he had been to Diyarbakir and we started talking about Kurdish politics, in BOTH southern and northern Kurdistan. At this point Danelle and I were trying to recruit him into Model Arab League, but when he started dropping references to Eddie Izzard and Monty Python..oh, we knew that he was one of us.

Today---milestone, sort of---I registered for my first semester of graduate classes---I'm soo excited! I can't wait for classes to start!

I read a lot of news today, and I know that I should comment soon on KBU , but I feel kind of numb with all of the goings on and for the moment I wish to be just a spectator. The goofy named "Phantom Fury" operation in Falligha (and yes, I know that I spelt that horribly wrong) is distrubing. When I heard about the plans for the offensive, all I could think of was that a lot of people were going to die. I feel weighted down with the realization. I hope other Americans feel the weight of our actions abroad.

this will sound crass, but

when is Arafat going to die?! It was alright when he was in the hospital, but now that everyone and their dog is on his deathwatch, I am too. Not because I particulary care about the Palestinian issue (I do, but I have other activist priorites) but because the second he dies, we are going to get a hundred press calls into the center. And "I" depends on me to get him the most up to date news so that he can comment on it. Part of me doesn't mind, because keeping up on the news is not seen as goofing off on my job, but quite helpful. I just hate having to wait for someone to die. Although my prediction is that he is already dead and that they are just waiting to affairs settled, like what they did with the President of the UAE died earlier this week. So there is my news gripe.

so at Steph's party last weekend, I met this guy named Nick, and he seemed really nice. Steph agreed to "talk" to him, but I kind of paniked at the thought of dating again. Odd really. humm... oh well.

and next Friday I am going to take off from work to celebrate Eid al-Fitr with my family. Now I am the only Muslim in the family, and I celebrate all of the Christian holidays with them, so we are starting a new tradition this year of celebrating the Muslim ones as well. My mom is going to buy the food, and I am going to make a huge meal for all of us, bread from scratch (I make excellent pita bread), kabobs, that sort of thing. It will be different and hopefully fun.

the return of JB

or rather of her horrible offspring.

Remember dear readers, that a few months back JB had surgury on her arm? well at the time she also got a temporary handicapped parking permit. It wasn't anything that she really needed, because in the beginning she wasn't supposed to drive at all, but she swore that she needed it because she would get "tired" walking from the parking lot to the building. Ok, I could have bought that excuse for a while.

But

JB shares a car with her daughter Shira, who takes classes at the University. JB has since gotten a new job terrorizing someone at a school somewhere in the valley. While I feel sorry for that unfortuately person, I am very glad that it isn't me. Shira however is a perfectly healthly 22 year old. Who is still sharing a car with her mother, and still---even though her Mom is not on campus---using and parking in the handicapped spots here on campus, as I noticed while walking into work this morning.

Now the law specifies those parking spots for those that need them, not the stupid selfish people of this earth who assume that if no one sees them leaving the car that it is ok to park there. These are the same type of people who if left alone in a room would have no problem stealing something if they knew that no one would find out. Where is this family's sense of right and wrong? JB and her horde are producing more and more generations of obnoxious, deceiving, and selfish people. Ugh! I fear for humanity.

the best quote of the election:

"...in an American election, there are no losers, because whether or not our candidates are successful, the next morning we all wake up Americans."
-John Kerry from his cessesion speech

So while I am disappointed that Bush won, things just return back to normal (although normalcy in our foreign policy sucks). When I was deciding how to vote, Bush and Kerry were pretty much the same on foreign policy and it was only domestic policy that they differed. And I am fine with paying more taxes as long as I see them accomplishing something, I am not ok however with tax cuts to people who can afford to pay their taxes. As far as I am concerned, if 20% is being taken out of my paycheck, then 20% should be taken out of someone like Donald Trump, an equal burden to us all.

It does sadden me for all the support that Bush has gotten from the Kurds in Northern Iraq. They like him because he removed Saddam from power. But he didn't remove him from power because he was concerned for the welfare of Iraq's "oppressed peoples". If helping the oppressed was really part of the US foreign policy agenda, just think of all of the horrific atrocities that the US should have intervened in and/or prevented. I would advise those who support him to be wary, because you will get burned if you trust in him too naively.

Stupid girl that I am...

so working at the wild and wonderful world of "The MEC" you get a lot of calls with absurd questions...well not always absurd, but definitley not something that you would think that I would have to know on the job.
For example

got a call from a gentleman in California attempting to download a Farsi font from the University website, okay this is a new one, and I had no clue, the University web people had no clue, and neither did the Languages and Literature department. Yet I managed to help this guy by figuring out how to download the font from the Microsoft Word website.

call number 2, a middle school in the valley needed an interpreter of Iraqi arabic to help with a parent-teacher problem. I suggested a couple of local students that I knew, and then also suggested the guy call Mushira, head of the languages and lit. department as she has this community project program started where arabic students go to grade schools and help tutor the new refugee students. I refered him to her because I thought that she would be able to at least give him a name or too. Well she called me right afterwards and chewed me out because one, I didn't know who to refer him too (we provide as much information as we can, but that is not part of my job description sweetheart), and two she basically didn't want to handle the call. Big fucking deal.
Throughout the call, all I wanted to do was hang up on her...I didn't as the repercussions would have been awful...however, she really hit a nerve and I cried afterwards...stupid girlie thing that that was. Anyway, Mushira is just an uppity woman who seems to think that since she has a PhD that that automatically makes her better than the rest of the world...which sorry to say, is obviously not the case.

I feel dumb for crying at work, at least it was discreet, and Mushira will never know the effect that it had on me..I am just angry that I let my emotions become that raw.

In other news, did you know that the President of the UAE died? He actually dies on Tuesday but they announced it today. "I" is currently doing a phone interview with Orbitz TV (Arabic but I believed based out of Italy) about the subject. Originally it was supposed to be about the elections today but they had to revise the topics a bit because of the lastest news.

...then a step to the right...

put your hands on your hips
and bend your knees in time
but it's pelvic thrust
that really drives you insane...
let's do the time warp again.

So Friday evening I went to Rocky Horror at the Tower Theater, ahhh what fun, what debauchery! it proved to be an opportunity to wear my new red fishnets and a dress that really didn't have much of a bottom, or a top come to think of it---but there was a middle that was a little on the see-through side. And anytime that I can get away with my glitter platform heels proves to be a good time.
the MC of the festivities, the fair Susan, was excellent as usual...Libby got a chance to see the one and only woman besides her that I have ever had a crush on...she wasn't impressed, oh well.
Then Saturday evening it was off to Ryan and Steph's for their Halloween party...and another oppurtunity to wear the fishnets..hee hee. I was more covered this time wearing all red and going as fire. We were to carve pumpkins, but when I got to the store I could only find a spagetti squash. I must have spent an hour carving a medusa head into it, only to have it implode upon itself when I put it down. I left early, 2:30am, it was snowing!! And I almost lost my heels in the mud trying to get the snow off of my car.

Tomorrow is election day, and I am excited for the sole reason that I will not get any more recorded messages on my WORK PHONE asking for my vote. If I have to listen to the ad for the county mayor one more time, I am gonna flip..."So on Tuesday, I ask you to vote for Peter Caroon for Salt Lake County mayor. Please check my website at Peter Caroon dot com, Caroon is spelled C-A-R-O-O-N, that's C-A-R-O-O-N..." ahhhhhhhh!